History

So, today Paul Tibbetts, who was the man who flew the bombing mission over Hiroshima, Japan on August 6, 1945, the occasion of the worlds first atomic bomb. He was 92 years old.

I'll give you a bit of background, shall I? This is WWII, Germany has been knocked out of the war, and we are planning a final invasion of Japan. Estimates of casualties if we hit the beaches indicate a 90 percent casualty rate in the leading divisions and more than 1 million casualties total. Even so, there is fierce debate in the US Government about whether the bomb should be used. Eventually, tho. President Harry Truman decides to go forward, reasoning that, at the very least the bomb will save American lives, and, considering the fierce resistance we have encountered so far, and the samurai culture of our enemy, the bomb is quite likely to save Japanese lives as well.

Instead, the bomb kills around 100 to 140 thousand people with thousands more dying later of related causes. In addition, the bomb spawns birth defects. A horrible cost in human loss and suffering, but it does indeed save American lives. A few days later we drop another one at Nagasaki, and Japan surrenders.

(A side note here. There are many who believe that even if Hiroshima was justifiable, Nagasaki was not. There was strong evidence that Japan was about to surrender, and many people urged Truman to wait a bit.)

However, this isn't really about justifying or condemning the actions, tho of course your response is welcomed. This is just a bit about General Tibbetts, and the changing nature of warfare.

By our standards today, everyone was committing war crimes then. Carpet bombing was standard procedure. The Americans were locking up not only war dissenters, but loyal Americans who had Japanese ancestry. The crimes of Germany and Japan of course are well documented, and Russia also was quite ruthless, tho given the severe losses they suffered, they perhaps were the most provoked.

(No, I haven't mentioned England, Italy, and other nations. I can't remember off the top of my head, and I just don't feel like doing any research. My point is everyone had blood on thier hands, by todays standards.)

Today, far from killing civilians as a matter of course, we go to great lengths to avoid thier deaths and feel outrage when they do happen, even if they are the civilian population of our enemy. Today, we are at "war with the government, not the people"), and we send humanitarian aid to those people. I like the change in mores, the more humanitarian face of war

Gen. Tibbetts himself expressed no reservations or regrets about his role, tho thru-out his life he was targeted for criticism as having committed an immoral act. He said he had a job to do, a duty to perform, and while not happy about killing so many people, he was happy to have ended the war and saved untold lives. I'm not sure he was as completely comfortable with his actions as he pretended, (killing 100, 000 people, regardless of thier status as an enemy, or as evil, or republican, whatever, would bother the fuck outta me). However, he was very clear that no shame attached to his actions, and that he considered his service honorable.

I'm interested to know how others feel. Personally, I feel I'm not competent to judge people who lived by the standards of other times. I do know that in war, it makes sense to place a higher priority on the lives of your people than those of your enemy.

Anyways....

(Salute) Thank you for your service, sir. Along with your thousands of comrades, we thank you for your service, and we owe you our freedom.

UPDATE!!

So, I'm in Redfield with me girl now. I'm too far away from my family and friends, don't like my job and can't get along with one of Jens kids. (Yes, actually, the one the rest of the post is about.) In my defense, even JEN says it isn't me.) So things aren't going real well, and wasn't I surprised to learn how fast all this could turn insignificant.

Now, I apologize for taking so long to let ya'll know about this, but I can't talk about really serious or scary stuff right away. And this was scary as all hell.

In fact, it's so scary that, before you go any further, let me just tell you this...

Nobody died.

Ready?

Jen's 16 yr old daughter was in a severe auto accident. Witnesses said she lost it going around a curve (a little over the limit, but the wet road was the main culprit) rolled her car 6 times and was thrown thru the sunroof on the 3rd one. She suffered a broken left leg, a broken clavicle, 4 breaks in the pelvis, a broken tailbone, a bruised lung, spleen and ribs, and a lacerated kidney. Somehow, tho, no head trauma. That's right, no head trauma.

The girl is supposed to be dead. Everyone knows it. Instead, she's in the hospital for a little over a month, and she's coming home this Saturday. O, she's still mostly bedridden for the next 2 months, and there's physical therapy and all that, but the point is, she's supposed to be dead.

I'm not sure how to share the rest of it, it'd take too long. But here are some things that stand out for me.

That feeling in my stomach when Jen's boss called, and told me they were on the way so I could drive Jen to the hospital...

The horrible look in Jen's eyes. All we knew at this time is the girl had been thrown from her car and was being taken by helicopter to the hospital. Jen was staring losing a child right in the face.

The way calming Jen down and comforting her made it easier for me to handle.

The way Jen kept trying to make phone calls even when she was crying too hard to talk.

The incredible relief when we heard she was stable and conscious.

The shock I received seeing her on the stretcher as she came in. If you have ever seen a child bloody, broken, bruised and reaching for her momma, you know what I'm talking about. I cried a bit then, soon's I could get to privacy.

After that, it calmed down a bit. The doctors were talking to us every 5 minutes and the news was always good. No head trauma. Nothing wrong with the spinal cord. (She chipped a vertebra, but it doesn't matter.) She had feeling in her limbs. Then...

"...And we expect a full recovery. She's asleep right now, but you can go look at her, if you're quiet."

So she's in the hospital for a while, Jen stays with her, so after the drama goes away I'm even MORE lonely, but of course I can't complain because it's so much worse for everyone else. It's amazing how fast you settle into the routine. Work, hospital, home, lose at poker, work, hospital, home, lose at poker. lol.

Now, a little over a month later, she's coming home. Wild, huh?

Goodbye, Caseys

Well, after a little more than 3 years, my time at Caseys has come to an end. I'm moving to Redfield to live with my girlfriend. Caseys is a convenience store with gasoline and a kitchen. We do a very brisk pizza pick up business. I am--was assistant manager. We've got about 15 people total working at the store, so we all know each other. You get kinda like family, ya know? Now....I'm done.

I'm SAD.

This was a job that I liked and excelled at. And I had so many friends, not just the coworkers, but the customers too. I'm gonna be lonely for a bit, I think. It's tuff to leave a job that you enjoy, especially when you love your coworkers and the customers you see so often.

Well, a little about the last shift, ok?

First of all, they threw me a party. I knew it was coming, but I didn't expect my area supervisor! I got gifts, and hugs, and cards, and a couple of girls were almost crying. Very touching.

My manager and my area supervisor took turns saying what I good job I'd done, and how they'd miss me, and if I ever wanted to come back, to just call. I knew I was good, but it's still nice to hear.

Then, all thru the night, customers were coming in just to wish me luck. More hugs, handshakes, and conversations that were way too brief because, even tho I was leaving, it was still Friday night, and the pizza orders were pouring in. But I made as much time as I could. I don't mind telling you, my eyes were rather wet at times, especially when some of the kids that are regulars in my store came in to give me a card and a hug, and tell me good bye. Kids are so sweet. It was totally worth all that money I spent helping them get thier candy when they were a little short.

The shift seemed to take forever, yet, time flew by, and before I knew it, we were locking up and walking out the door. A few last hugs, promises to keep in touch, then it's over. I can't believe I forgot to flip off the security camera.....

Mixed emotions here.

I know, I'll make new friends. And living with my girlfriend will bring a new level of joy, comfort and intimacy which can only enrich my life. It's not that I'm not looking forward with anticipation, I am, but at the same time I'm looking back with memories and love. (Wow, that's just WAY cheesy. But I worked on that phrase for a long time, and that's the best I can do.)

This post is already way to long.

So long, Caseys. It's been a lotta fun.

July 4th

So it's Independence Day. Let's see...1776 to 2007, thats what, 231 years? So, 231 years ago, the American Colonies told the British Empire to fuck off. And the world may never be the same.

A quick look at things. The Continental Congress made it's first motion for independence a month earlier and the vote was taken on July 2, not July 4. (They worked on the wording for a bit) Also, we didn't achieve independence until around 1781, when Cornwallis surrendered to the combined American and French forces at Yorktown, which led to peace negotiations culminating in the Treaty of Paris (I think) on September 3, 1783. I often wonder why we don't remember Sep 3, not July 4.

Still, July 4 was the date on the document and it was the beginning of a great thing. July 4 rev erberates thru history, literally. (July 4 is a big date for America nearly a 100 years later during the Civil War, when Lee is turned back at Gettysburg and Grant takes Vicksburg, along with control of the Mississippi River.) Interesting coincidence, huh? I may research and find out what else happened on July 4. Anyway, people all over the world know july 4 and what it represents. And even to our enemies, the date must bring a thrill, for it speaks of freedom.

Independence, freedom, democracy, equality. These are the ideals which mark the American Nation. No, we don't always live up them, but when you reach that high, even failure accomplishes quite a bit. We're at a low point right now, but we've been there before and we've always bounced back. We'll do it again.

We started something big. When we got started, our status as a democracy made us nearly unique, and now, hundreds of nations practice democracy, and the growth continues. Mistakes are being made, and the cost is huge, but we have a chance now, to see democracy take place in places where you would not have thought it possible a couple decades ago. Along with our friends and allies, we have a chance at a world where freedom, democracy and human rights are the rule, not the exception. If we can make it-and I think we can-we're gonna leave a world for our grandchildren that surpasses the wildest dreams of even the most optimistic of our founding fathers.

First, tho, we gotta get rid of Bush.

A brief aside here. Even tho England and America fought 2 bitter wars at the very beginning, we've been fast friends ever since, standing side by side in several large wars. Muskets and cannon fire couldn't hide the fact that our nations share many common ideals, human rights, freedom, peace and a commitment to face evil where we find it. We're squabbling a bit now, but it don't mean a thing. If something or someone threatens one of us, then, like a brother, the other one will leap to lend aid. You're just gonna have to get used to it, we LIKE each other.

That's all for now!

More pretzels, please

Yesterday, George Bush claimed executive priviledge and defied subpoenas from Congress for the testimony of some of his underlings.

It is the latest, (tho not the last) and most egregious (but only to date) offence of a President who is managing with his ego instead of his brain, and who shows no intention of learning from his mistakes.

From a disastrous war with Iraq, to Abu Graib, to incredible incompetence in the Israeli-Palestine conflict, to the continuing inaction in the Darfur massacres, George Bush has shown a massive talent for ignoring common sense and the will of the American people.

Now, he is defying subpoena's from Congress in his latest attempt to stall thier investigation. Claiming executive priviledge, he has said those subpoena'd will not show up. AND he blamed congress for it. This latest act of executive arrogance gives us frightening insight into the man.

He is now desperate, and angry. You know what's coming next. He's gonna attack Iran. And a nation full of people who like us (despite what the goverment of Iran says, Americans are generally liked by Iranians) will quickly learn to hate us.

Iraq will be what he is remembered for, see. And Iran's government is helping the terrorists in Iraq. We all know this. Plus, there's the nuclear weapons thing. So he thinks he has a chance to kill 2 birds with one stone by dethroning the Iranian government. But it wont work.

Well, think about it, nothing else he's done has worked. But here's what's gonna happen. Let's say he destroys the nuclear capabilities of Iran AND removes the government. Now the terrorists have ANOTHER country to spread their war. We probably won't be able to set up a government there, either, and so the population will suffer, and our image will suffer, and more people will decide to fight us. He'd likely fail in at least one of his goals anyway, but in this instance, failure and success accomplish the same thing, another country who's corrupt government and oppressed people find common ground in thier hatred of America.

I bet bin Laden sends him thank you cards. Our president couldn't do more for the evil we're facing if he tried.

Remember when he almost choked to death on a pretzel? We were so close....

Time

His name is Lou, and he's 76 years old. His wife tells me he has dementia. Something about the frontal lobes, which I didn't understand, but the effect, she says, is a lot like Alzheimer's Disease. He can't learn anything new, no matter how many times you show him, he can't manage simple tasks on his own, and he has a scary tendency to wander off. On bad days, he doesn't always know who she is.

In better times, he got a degree in Engineering, raised 2 children and saved a couple peoples lives in Vietnam by efficient first aid after a shell hit his base. He was told he was going to get a medal, but it never came thru. He never cared about that, she says. He was just happy to get out alive, and anyway, he figured the combat troops should get the medals.

He must have been something special, because by the way his wife looks at him and talks to him, you can tell she simply adores him.

"I don't care what problems he has" she tells me. "I love him and I'm lucky to have him."

She didn't have any pictures in her purse of him as a young man, but we've all seen them before. Young, healthy, athletic men, with t-shirts showing bulging biceps, and smiles that show they don't have the slightest idea that someday another person will look at that photograph and try to reconcile what they see there with the frail gentleman with shaking hands and liver spots standing in front of them.

Time is weird that way. It creeps by, unnoticed, then one day, you're asking "Where has the time gone?" It changes people, slowly but inevitably, until they're completely different people. Healthy, vital young men into palsied old timers, vibrant minds into nightmarish, delusional confusion. Somehow, even tho you see the changes day by day, you don't notice the effects until something happens that makes them jump out at you and you wonder "when did that happen?"

We say it heals all wounds, but it strikes me more as a great thief, slowly taking friends, family, health, memories, and at the last, even life. It's kinder to some than others, but in the end, it betrays us all.

Lou deserved better from time than to be left standing in a daze, completely ignorant of how important he is, how much he means to others, how much more he used to be. I look at him with pity, but also trepidation, because he makes me wonder what time is planning for me. I hear my parents talking about me as a child, I have memories of myself in earlier times, and already there's a lack of recognition of that younger self. At least I still have the memories. Lou doesn't even have that.